A Bloody Good Time: Exploring Periods and Sexuality
Periods and sexuality are two traditionally taboo topics; disrupting the idealised, blank canvas of the body with a splash of fluid reality. This blog will explore the connection between these two experiences, examining how, when brought together, they can dismantle shame and social stigma.
The menstrual cycle has a huge effect on sexual libido. The estrogen and progesterone that ebb and flow through the body are like horny puppet masters, playing with your hormonal desires. Research has found that this desire typically bubbles up before ovulation and simmers down after. Although a whole host of other forces are at work determining libido, it is important to acknowledge the effect of this relationship. Period tracking apps such as EVE embrace the connection between periods and sexuality, encouraging users to track both simultaneously. This emphasizes how sexual pleasure can be deepened through an understanding of the menstrual cycle, helping the menstruator decipher what works for them, and when. Furthermore, this self-awareness undermines personal shame, encouraging a more sensitive understanding of one’s own body.
The desexualisation of the menstruating subject illustrates the cultural stigma around periods - the sanitary pad rendered a chastity belt that locks the menstruator out of their natural desires. This stigma is best exemplified in the taboo of period sex. A Bodyform poll found that one in five adults saw period sex as taboo. The same number also stated that they wouldn’t talk to their partners about their period in general. This correlation emphasises that this feeling of taboo is rooted in the shame and silencing of menstruation, with the menstruator’s agency and feelings displaced due to their portrayal in society.
Michaela Coel’s 2020 series I May Destroy You was celebrated for its presentation of period sex, featuring a scene that saw a male partner removing his partner’s bloody tampon, and even prodding at a clot curiously before they have sex. This not only drew back the veil hung over mainstream period representation but also illustrated a new style of sex scene, that emphasises the sexiness rooted in communication, comfort and realistically messy encounters.
Artists such as Sandy Kim and Nolwen Cifuentes also celebrate period sex through their photography.
In this image, Sandy Kim is reimagining the blood stained sheets - a symbol that once confirmed virginity and purity after marriage, a marker of female virtue and value - transformed into a celebration of sexual freedom instead.
Nolwen Cifuentes work features queer couples post-coital, with blood-smeared mouths and fingers. The intimacy and tenderness of these intertwined bodies illustrates the positive effects of period sex; drawing lovers together through this radical acceptance and loving embrace of one another.
Period sex actually has a lot of pros. Orgasms can help reduce PMS and cramps. Blood can act as a natural lubricant. Research has also found that the surge of testosterone at this time can trigger sensitivity and arousal, particularly after the first couple of days of your cycle. Furthermore, the communication and intimacy fostered through this experience can do wonders to alleviate sexual anxiety. Periods are famously temperamental and can arrive unexpectedly like an uninvited third party; turning a twosome into a slightly messier threeway. Being open to period sex means being open to the fact that sex is unpredictable, and what matters is creating a space where everyone feels comfortable and accepted.
It is important to remember that you can still get pregnant, and you can still get an STI, so protection is essential as always. But, if you feel so inclined, put down a towel and enjoy - it might just be a bloody good time.